***i know the blog posts have been infrequent, and i’m developing a bit of a ‘fuck this and that’ theme. it’s not permanent. lots going on. good things. sad things. hopeful things. creative things. much more to say soon. but must experience it all more first.***
so, anyway …
fuck chase bank.
these capitalist pigs, man. anybody who thinks this whole thing we got going over here is really good for the common human is fucking out of their mind.
case in point:
last year, new administration passes an early financial regulation bill aimed to make it harder for banks to just pile fees on people without them having an option to decline the ‘services’ creating the fees.
for example, let’s say you have a bank account without a lot of money in it, say $10. you go buy lunch somewhere that costs $12 using your check card. the bank would ‘cover’ that payment, allowing it to go through, but would then hit you with a fee. mine at chase bank was $27 when this happened recently. so i end up paying $39 bucks for lunch.
but let’s say i have another account, or a credit card, and could have just used that account had the card just not worked in the first place. declined. no money. gotta find some other way to pay. or no lunch. or you’re washing dishes.
so i’m in the bank today, and they say, ‘oh, there are changes coming to your account soon. you need to go sign a paper over there with ms. jones.’
so i go see ms. jones, and i say, ‘shit, ms. jones, when there are changes to the bank account, it’s usually not good for the consumer, huh?’
she says, ‘oh, no! people are really liking these changes!’
right.
so she gets up, gets some forms, and sits down with a stack of huge, colorful, laminated cards and attempts to sell me what chase bank has called ‘triple protection!’
here’s the scoop. the new law says that customers need to be able to opt out of these ‘protection’ services if they don’t want them. sometimes you don’t need to spend $39 for a $10 lunch. i get this. this is smart government. this is what i want.
but chase has clearly spent millions in marketing to make the new law … a profit reducer for them, to be sure … something that the consumer really needs and wants. ‘triple protection’ means that if you write a check over the amount you have, the bank will cover it for you! for a fee!
that’s the same fucking deal i have now that sucks. they’re trying to tell me to select the shitty status quo by rebranding it and trying to sell it to me as a positive.
who thinks this shit up?
i told ms. jones, ‘this is clearly a way to get around the effects of that new law, isn’t it?’
she gave me the whole, ‘sir, that’s why we give you a choice.’
i said, ‘bull shit, ms. jones. this ‘choice’ is the result of the government slightly fucking with the racket you folks have going, and you folks trying desperately to skirt the issue. this is shameful shit, ms. jones.’
‘so you don’t want triple protection, then?’ she says.
‘that’s correct. i am declining triple protection.’
then, after all this, she tried to get me to pay $25 a year for a check card that accumulates points at kohl’s and home depot and some such shit.
unbelievable.
moral of the story:
fuck chase bank.
fuck triple protection.
fuck ms. jones and all who conspire with her.
workers of the world.
unite?
yeah, right.
2 responses so far ↓
i hear that! Chase bank are wankers! royal cock suckers!!! worst customer service in the world.
right on, paul. i read recently people are flocking to pre-paid debit cards because they are finally getting fed up with these bull shit fees ($5 to use an ATM, $12 a month account charge if your account doesn’t have $1500 in it, etc.) they already have our money and are investing it at a huge profit for themselves … that should be plenty. everything else is pure greed.