i’m in.
at the height of despair (i was visiting a townhouse that i thought was ‘pretty nice’) i drove past a house in southdowns with a for rent sign. less than an hour later i was writing a check. it’s cute and perfect and more money than i wanted to spend but i just got that feeling. two bedroom, nice backyard, great neighborhood. it’s an old place and could use a paint job, but it’s got wood floors and build in bookcases and a washer dryer and central a/c. $950. i was hoping to not spend more than $850, but this place was at least $100 cheaper than all the other two bedroom houses i saw in southdowns, so i’ll just have to write a few more articles for lovetoknow and suck it up. i’ve got plenty of room for visitors. y’all hear that?
i realized i took zero, that’s right, zero photos of baton rouge after my first day there. amazing, huh? i was working pretty hard and just didn’t get to it. i won’t be back down there until around the first. those first few weeks of august i’ll take a shit load and do a little gallery. it really is a beautiful little city. really reminds me of a hot and humid teeny tiny portland with a lot less hipness. there is hipness, but its minimal. probably just enough hipness.
**
the week while i was driving around, howard 100 on sirius was running a special on all the game shows played over the years. truly the height of stern’s satirical prowess … i should do my dissertation on the stern show game shows. they had them all: the classic black jeopardy (always played for black history month) where king of all blacks (sanitation worker and the most materialistic human being on the planet) spent about ten minutes ridiculing the intellectual, militant angry black’s shoes and clothing (his pants are so tight i got hard when he walked in). there was guess the jew with fred as kurt voldheim junior, guess the poof, retards versus klansmen howie-weird squares, black people versus wiggas jeopardy, stump the booey where hank the angry drunken dwarf destroyed gary and then passed out on the floor, the nearly-wed game where howard and beth got every question right and robin and mr. x got every question wrong … unbelievable. here’s a link to the torrent of day 4 if anyone’s interested.
i slept about ten hours last night after the seven hour drive back up here. i was pooped. need to get my shit back together a bit. do some work and some laundry and hang out with young lefty (who i missed terribly). he has learned to open up his crate door with his nose since i left. smarter than he looks …
Tags: 9 Comments
9 responses so far ↓
Been following your progress. Glad to hear you’re getting settled. Don’t forget Y’all are always welcome in the ATL. We’ve got plenty of room.
After readin the “Mr Kevin” thing, I thought I’d give you a heads up on a few more “living in the South idiosyncrasies” to be aware of -
1.) The “War of Northern aggression” is the Civil War. Took me a while to figure that out. People down here seem to know a hell of a lot more about that war than people in the rest of the country. Losin’ll do that to you I guess…
2.) Tell ‘em you’re from the “Midwest” – not the North and certainly not from California. Midwesterners are the salt of the Earth (I actually hear that quite a lot from people down here). People from California are “crazy” and Northerners are universally despised. When I first moved to the ATL from CA, I spent 10 hours in the DMV trying to get my license changed from CA to GA. No joke…
3.) If you get a chance – catch a couple of “Dukes of Hazzard” re-runs and emulate what you see. It really is like that once you get outside the major cities. Old Burt Reynolds movies are good too (Deliverance, Smokie and the Bandit, etc.).
4.) College football is King and people strongly identify with “their school” – even if they never went to said school or college in general. Also, people will ask you “What conference ya’ll in” so have an answer ready (you are in the SEC West BTW).
kd! you’re a genius. how far’s atl from baton rouge? i’ll have to look that up …
good tip on the ‘midwest’ thing. i wasn’t getting too much love with the california angle, and to say ‘illinois’ is apparently to say ‘north’.
the college football thing is already frightening me. you can feel the frenzy, even in the summer.
Being from IL means YOU burned down our state and destroyed our proud heritage (at least in GA). Your Land of Lincoln past is actually *slightly* worse than being from Land of Liberal.
Funny tidbit, president’s day is not a recognized holiday in GA. You know why? Because its at least partially a celebration of Lincoln. Crazy.
Piece of advice if you’re wooin a southern bell or trying to avoid getting beatin up by a redneck in a bar, stare into your beer and mutter “Fuckin Sherman.”
Maybe that only works here in Georgia…
In general though the South is like one big state, except for South Carolina. That’s the redneck state. Unless you live there. Then West Virginia’s the redneck state…
Send me your #… I’d like to come visit before the newest depeugh arrives around x-giving ….
Yea!!!! Game on. Ok, just let me know the best time of year to visit and I’ll start the plan
number will remain the same. my address will change, of course. happy to have some visitors lining up!
put me and john on your visitors list. the motherly half of this soul is relieved that you’ve found a perfect place to live, the party girl can’t wait to hang.
k.d. had some excellent advice for you. what would i say to southerners, since i AM from california? working on my fake i.d. immediately…right after i check the stern game show link. (still waiting for that white girl joke btw…)
woah, i did not intend for that emoticon to show up. some weird elipsis html code. hopefully, you don’t think less of me.
consider yourselves added, lt. you two would dig it down here. big, nice, lovely campus (hint, hint).
yeah, we’ll have to figure out some good lie for you since you’re obviously ‘crazy’ being from california and all. my dad had a good line … when you tell them you’re from california and they make a weird face, just say ‘but i got to louisiana as fast as i could!’ usually wins ‘em right over!